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No matter what happens at this year’s Primetime Emmy Awards… one thing’s for certain… The critical press is abuzz with hope that Joss
Whedon, creator of Buffy: the Vampire Slayer and Angel doesn’t go away empty handed. Joss wrote the 1992 movie
Buffy: the Vampire Slayer and created the t.v. series by the same name as well as Angel, Buffy’s spin off.
Everyone is excited by the consistently high quality of writing on both these shows, especially
Buffy. Rarely is a show so consistently well-written and engaging. Joss, while he doesn’t write every single episode, approves every script and makes changes wherever he sees fit.
To add a smile to the dog days of summer, I thought I’d share some of my favorite exchanges from the two shows. Although I must admit, this was a practically impossible feat, since crackling dialogue, charming characterization and blood churning conflict bleeds from every script page. Feel free to e-mail me with your favorite exchanges. Enjoy!
Faith: "Now, we've only done one of the five basic torture groups. We've done blunt, but that still leaves sharp, hot, cold and loud. Have a preference? Oh that's great. It's always better with audience participation. May I take your order please?"
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Riley:
"Buffy. When I saw you stop the world from, you know, ending . . . I just assumed that was a big week for you. Turns out I suddenly find myself . . . needing to know the plural of
'apocalypse'."
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Buffy:
" You guys research the Polgara demon. I want to know where it is. When I find it I'm going to make him pay for taking that kid's life, I'll make him die in ways he can't even imagine. That probably would have sounded more commanding if I wasn't wearing my yummy sushi pajamas."
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Faith:
" Isn't it crazy how slaying always makes you hungry and horny?"
Buffy: " Well… sometimes I crave a non-fat yogurt afterwards."
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Xander:
" I'd hate to see the pursuit of a homicidal lunatic get in the way of pursuing a homicidal lunatic."
Buffy:
" Well, Faith's not exactly low-profile girl. I'll patrol and wait for her to make a move."
Giles:
" But then what?"
Willow:
"Oooh! I have an idea! Beat the crap out of her!"
Xander:
" Good plan."
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Faith:
" Are you saying I got to apologize?"
Angel:
" Think you can?"
Faith:
" I don't know. How do you say, 'Gee, I'm really sorry I tortured you nearly to death?'"
Angel:
" Well, first off I think I'd leave off the 'gee.'"
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Kendrick:
" Come on, Kate. Everybody knows you've gone all Scully. Anytime one of these weird cases crosses anyone's desk - you're always there. What's going on with you?"
Kate:
" Scully is the skeptic."
Kendrick:
" Huh?"
Kate:
" Mulder is the believer. Scully is the skeptic."
Kendrick:
" Scully is the chick right?"
Kate:
" Yes, but she's not the one that wants to believe."
Kendrick:
" And you want to believe?"
Kate:
" Oh, I already believe. That's the problem."
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Cordelia:
" Like I'm gonna stick around while psycho case is roaming lose downstairs with three tons of medieval weaponry? Not! Oh, and I'm thinking (points to donuts) sugar high, maybe not a great idea."
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Willow: (regarding the college acceptance letters she received) M.I.T., Barnard, some German Polytechnical Institute whose name I can't pronounce...
Xander: Is anyone else intimidated? Because I'm just expecting paper-thin slips
with the words "no way" written on them in crayon.
Oz: Nah, I hear they type those.
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"Out
of the Mouths of Angel and Buffy"
